I was just going to write all this down in a whiny e-mail to Susie, but then I decided, hey, I haven’t posted anything on my blog lately, so I’ll whine to everybody. How about that? Maybe it’s TMI for most of you, but oh well, you don’t have to read it! I haven’t even blogged about our wonderful trip to Virginia to visit Jill and her family. That was an “Adventures with Grandpa” chapter and a half! Unfortunately I forget a lot of the funniest parts. It’s sad that I can’t just stop and say, hold on Dad; let me jot something down before I forget. I’ll have to try to dredge through my memory to come up with some adventures we had that week, though, because there were lots. Anyway …
I couldn’t sleep last night. I really can’t figure out why. Working four ten-hour shifts a week, I try really hard to get a good night’s sleep every work night, and I got to bed a little late as it was, but after I got in there, I just couldn’t go to sleep. I turned on the TV and watched whatever for a while. Turned it off and tried to sleep. No luck. Turned on light and read a magazine for a while. Tried to sleep. Nope. Turned on the light and read scriptures! Tried to sleep. No, not for a long while. The only thing I can blame it on is that I got a lot of sleep over the weekend because I had a stomach ache all day Friday and Saturday, and I pretty much slept all day and night both those days. So maybe that’s why.
Anyway, I woke up early this morning for some reason. I got up to go to the bathroom and when I got back into bed, I knew I wasn’t going to go back to sleep. It just wasn’t happening. So, I thought, hey, I’ve been trying to make myself get up early and exercise forever (was going to start right after I got home from VA but I hurt my back and was out of commission exercise-wise for a while). So I got up, put on one of my raggedy house dresses, and went to look at my collection of Wii exercise games. I decided to do the barely-used Just Dance 3 that I got from Joanna and Shayler for Christmas (yes, I had it on my Christmas wish list – they didn’t get it because they thought I needed it, if that’s what you’re thinking). I picked a couple of random songs and imitated the figure on the screen as best I could. They were faster than my usual fare, and it was fun (mostly). After several songs I went to get in the shower.
I felt pretty winded and sweaty, but I didn’t see it as a big deal. I washed my hair and everything, so all the sweatiness would be gone, right? Wrong! After I got out of the (cool) shower, I swear, I continued to sweat from every pore. Since I planned to wear a dress, I put some of my fake tan stuff on my legs, arms, and other places that would show. I blow-dried my hair and went downstairs to feed the dogs.
Chica has been rather out of sorts lately (more than usual); a lot of the time she doesn’t want to eat and will only eat a little if I cheer her on. I’ve been a bit worried about her, since against all odds she survived doggy lupus about a year and a half ago, so anytime she won’t eat, I get concerned. Most of the time she wolfs down every morsel and then goes to see if Dobby has anything left in his dish (he wisely eats faster and is always done before she is). Unfortunately, this time she seems to think that if SHE isn’t eating, DOBBY shouldn’t eat, either, and she has managed to communicate this opinion to him. Dobby, being the chicken dog that he is, will obey her unspoken (unbarked?) command. He has been either leaving his bowl untouched or, if I tell him to stay over there and eat, he will lie down on the rug next to his dish and eat nothing. This has been going on for several days, with neither one eating a full dish at breakfast or dinner, so today I decided to take matters into my own hands and I sat down on a chair near Dobby and told him to eat, and he did.
All this is fine and dandy, but it wasn’t on my getting-ready schedule and time was running out. As I sat there, I glanced at my legs, and oh no, they were looking streaky from excess sweating! I tried to rub them to even them out, but the fake tan had already dried that way (I use a kind that is tinted so you can see where you’re putting it). I went upstairs and put more fake tan on my legs, hoping it would even out, and then quickly started to put on my makeup. I thought I did an okay job until I glanced into my magnifying mirror and saw that, since my face was still sweating in spite of the fan that was blowing on me, the makeup looked like I’d laid it on with a trowel, and not very evenly, either! My face looked like it had about 1/4 inch of flesh-colored mud; we’re in the desert, which means it was also beginning to crack. I grabbed a face wipe and wiped it all off. (Okay, okay, it wasn’t exactly a face wipe – it was a container of baby butt wipes that had dried out completely, so I had poured water and astringent over them. They work fine. None of them have actually touched a baby’s butt.)
I was out of time, so I grabbed my small bag of makeup essentials to put on in the car and got dressed. The legs still looked streaky, so I grabbed some light body makeup, hoping that it would be just enough to cover the streaks. Well, since my legs were still sweating, they were damp, and the body makeup goes on REALLY dark when it’s wet. So now I had really dark streaks. I covered them the best I could, grabbed my makeup bag and purse, and rushed out the door. I applied my makeup at red lights (mostly) and made it to work only a few minutes late. I swear I kept sweating for hours. My body was obviously in shock.
Unfortunately, though, my legs look like I dipped them in dark brown paint (that had run a bit), and they got darker as the day wore on (you know that fake tan gets darker after several hours). Of course the rest of my body (that showed) was lightly tanned. Not a match, not even close! I tried to keep my legs under my desk as much as possible, but of course there were a couple of trips I had to make to the General Manager’s Office. Naturally, the gal who usually helps me is off this week, so I couldn’t ask her to go.
Oh, well. I guess I’ll be wearing pants for the rest of the week.
Oh, and by the way … the incident where I hurt my back when I first got back from our trip to Virginia? I was twisting around trying to put fake tan on the back of my legs before church and there was a little popping sound and then the pain in my back gradually began. Sounds like I should give up on fake tan? NEVER!
P.S. I actually wrote this last week, but then I decided not to post it. Too boring or something. But here I go anyway! And if anybody is wondering about Chica’s health, I took her to our vet last Friday and it isn’t doggy lupus, it’s some bad teeth. What a relief! She’s going in for dental surgery this Friday. Keep your fingers crossed that she gets through the anesthesia okay! --k.